Okay, so I have a confession to make.  Every week I eagerly wait for our local newspaper to arrive in our mailbox.  Now, I would like to tell you that it is because I am very civic minded and enjoy reading about the many wonderful things happening in our community and ways I can get involved, but that’s just not true.  Honestly, I just love reading the police reports.  Peter and I have a good time imagining the people and situations behind the news.

Take for example the report in the paper this past winter about a snowman getting his head knocked off.  Peter figures that only some cranky old man would report a snowman getting decapitated.  “Those gosh darn kids!” But I don’t think that kind of guy builds a snowman in the first place, so that one mystified us a bit.

Another favorite of mine was the car that was reported stolen.  According to the report, the distinguishing feature of the car was a bumper sticker that said “Drive it like you stole it.” I guess they did.

More recently, there was one about a pair of night vision goggles being stolen from a residence.  I asked Peter, “What sort of person has night vision goggles laying around their home?” Peter said, “Your brother.”  I said, “Oh, yeah, I guess that could happen to anyone, really.”

While we have fun with our current newspaper, we miss the reports of the paper we used to get when we lived further outside the cities last year.  Plastic lawn chairs going missing, neighbors dogs in the chicken coop, various animals out on the loose.  Oh, and I’ll never forget my all time favorite, the guy who couldn’t get the police to come get rid of the people who were hunting (legally) on the property next to his.  So he ran an extension cord down to his property line, hooked up a boom box and played music at them as loud as he could.  The police did end up coming to issue a citation, but they gave it to the guy with the boom box, not the hunters.

You just can’t make this stuff up!

To make up for my uncivic reveling in the police reports, I did scan the rest of the latest paper.  Turns out applications are being taken for married women interested in becoming the next Mrs. Minnesota.  There is no swimsuit competition, but there is a personal interview as well as an aerobic wear competition.  Huh?

Like I said, you really can’t make this stuff up!

Speaking of flag day, my friend Keity was over yesterday, but she had to leave to go to a “Ringing in Flag Day” party.  Talk about any excuse to have a party! Keity said this friend throwing the party goes all out with Red, White and Blue decorations for her annual flag day party.

This got me reminiscing about parties and fun themes.  The best theme party I’ve ever thrown was for Peter’s birthday last year.  We were living in a log cabin at the time, so Red Neck party seemed like a great theme.  We played Lynyrd Skynyrd, had NASCAR balloons and played with the plastic dart shooting shotgun I found at the dollar store.  My favorite decorative touch though was the Christmas lights haphazardly wrapped around the front porch, only two of the six strands blinking.  It was a fun theme and a fun party.  Plus I got to see what Peter would look like with a mullet:

How ’bout you?  What’s the craziest/funniest/weirdest theme/excuse for a party that you’ve ever participated in?  I’d love to hear about it!

Today is a big day, but before I tell you why, let me go back in time just a bit…

Valentine’s Day 2007 – Peter gave me the best Valentine’s Day gift ever.  It was a beautiful Waring Pro waffle iron.  Not just any waffle iron, a Belgian waffle iron.  The kind that you pour the batter in, close the iron and then turn the handle so the waffle iron flips over, evenly coating both griddles to achieve delicious crunchy-golden-on-the-outside, soft-warm-fluffy-on-the-inside waffles.  They were truly fantastic!

We ate many waffles over the following months.  Turns out waffles not only make a great breakfast, but are a quick and easy dinner and go with practically anything you might have leftover in your fridge.  Fruit, bacon, sausage, ham, whip cream… doesn’t really matter, it’s all good…  I raved about my waffle iron.

But then came that fateful day in August of 2008, 6 months after the warranty had expired, when my waffle iron simply quit working in the middle of a batch of waffles.  No warning, it just died.  I went through many of the stages of grief: Denial (it’s not dead, I just need to plug it into a different outlet), Anger (stupid Waring Pro, how could they make such a sub-standard product) and Depression (dinner time, staring into the fridge, all I can see is my milk, eggs and Bisquick).

I had a hard time letting go, but I am proud to say that 10 months later, I have finally reached the stage of Acceptance and have purchased a new waffle iron!  After much research (during which I discovered that many people had the same problem with the Waring Pro maker) I selected the Wlliams Sonoma 4 Square Waffle Maker by All Clad.  The manager at WS assured me that this iron will not die and that if for some strange reason it did, I can bring it back ant time for a refund.

Now I just have to find out if it makes good waffles.  The iron is going for its maiden voyage tomorrow morning accompanied by bacon, sausage, whip cream, strawberries and real maple syrup.  If anyone wants to come help test it out, just give me a call.  Really.  Consider it a reward for reading to the end of a long blog entry about waffle irons.