You probably haven’t been thinking this, but just in case you were, sorry for not posting much lately.
I have to admit, I’ve been a bit blue for the past week and a half. Not for any particular reason. I mean, everything is fine, nothing tragic to report. I think I do know what’s bugging me though…
A week and a half ago Sunday was Lydia’s last day of breastfeeding. I thought that after being a pregnant and/or breastfeeding mom for the past three years and seven months straight through, it would feel really fantastic to be just me again. I thought I’d be flying high.
I feel completely out of whack.
I read this post by another mommy blogger though, and it really helped. I mean, not helped me magically snap out of it, but helped me realize that I’m essentially going through withdrawal. Apparently my brain is still craving the high created by the lovely ‘bonding’ hormones that your body produces when you feed your baby.
So if it’s not enough that Lydia was mad (and I mean MAD!) when I dropped her last feeding, apparently my body is punishing me too.
All that’s left to do is to keep telling myself what I’ve been telling Lydia. We’re all done. I’m sorry you’re sad, I know it’s hard, but we are all done. And really, it’s for the best.
Happy thoughts from one mommy to another. I know what that withdrawal is like, and I only nursed for 5 months. Cheer up! It may not be for forever if you can convince Peter to try for a third…
;-)
This if very interesting! Since April of 2003 I have been constantly pregnant or nursing EXCEPT for that one year between weaning Lincoln and getting pregnant with Berean. That year was awful. I don’t think I was clinically depressed, but I did go to the MD because I was so tired and felt like I had no energy. I went to my ob too because of some other symptoms, he told me my body was “trying to find itself” after being preg/bfing for so long. I remember wanting to get pregnant so bad so I could stop being on a rollercoaster ride of hormones. I had never had PMS symptoms until that year. After reading your post I am sure that my fatigue, some paranoia and anxiety were probably all related, although at the time I thought they were separate issues. It makes me dread weaning Everyn! Last week I read a blog post by someone that experienced anxiety, depression etc after having her tubes tied! That is not uncommon either and that freaks me out too… interesting post, and I hope you feel better soon!
Julie – yeah, it’s a weird thing, because it doesn’t feel related to weaning. I mean, I’m glad to be done, mentally that is. I don’t feel like Lydia and I are less close or anything like that. But I still feel depressed, anxious, stressed about a whole bunch of other things that probably wouldn’t normally bother me that much. So I guess I can either wait it out or get pregnant again! :-)
go ahead and get pregnant again Elise:) and Julie you can always just get pregnant again too when you about to stop feeding Ever!
That is a really interesting article. I had never heard about depression related to weaning, but with the hormonal changes it makes a lot of sense. Thanks for posting about this!
My hormones were so significant with the twins (double the hormones!!), the nurses warned me of the hormone change that would come with weaning. I was really glad to have the heads-up that it would be a difficult time.