Today Alethea and I had a fun, but busy, morning. In order to stay on track, I employed a series of Mommy Tricks. Here’s how it went:
TRICK #1: SUCKER AT THE POLLS
No, I wasn’t the sucker, I gave Alethea a dum-dum sucker so that I could vote. Turns out that a small sucker buys me just enough time to do my civic duty. (It also turns out that being dressed in pink from head to toe isn’t enough to keep Alethea from being called a ‘little fellow’, but that’s a post for another day.)
After we voted we headed to the park. As it happens, there were some lovely children there before we arrived who decided to coat the slides with mud. Not just one slide… all of the slides in the park (what makes mischievous children so thorough?) If I’d been a more experienced mom, I might have been ready to use TRICK #2: PULL OUT THE OLD TOWEL, you know the handy rag-like towel that the prepared mother keeps in the car at all times for emergency situations like slide cleaning, but alas, I had no towel, so I resorted to…
TRICK #3: DISTRACTION BY SUBSTITUTION
Alethea said, “Slide! Slide!” And I said, “Alethea, look, the swings are right over there!” The swings were an acceptable distraction.
TRICK #4: LEAD A HORSE TO WATER
I thought maybe we could get to the car by baby steps. “Look at those bikes on the bike rack over there, Alethea!” (Alethea goes to examine the bikes = we move closer to the car.) “Look at that tall tree, Alethea!” (We move still closer.) A big truck goes by on the road and Alethea voluntarily walks a few more steps. Suddenly she stops, points and says, “Car.” In my most positive voice I said, “You’re right, Alethea, that’s our car!”
She looks at me, looks at the car, looks at me, then realization floods over her face and she yells, “Nooooo!” turns and runs in the other direction.
So much for trick #4.
At that point I was down to…
TRICK #5: WHEN ALL ELSE FAILS
Chase your kid down, pick them up, put them in the car (even if screaming), go home. Not really my best Mommy Trick, but sometimes it’s what it takes.